Konke-okanye-akukho nto yokucinga bubugcisa obutshabalalisayo bokungahoyi ama-nuances obomi. Ngokulula ngakumbi, ukucinga ngokugqithisileyo. Abanye abantu bayibiza ngokuba kukucinga okumnyama nokumhlophe okanye ukucinga nge-absolutist. I-Pacific CBT, umbutho ojongene nonyango lokuziphatha kwengqondo, iyichaza njengepateni yokucinga ebeka yonke imeko ukuya kuthi ga ngoku. iinketho ezimbini imbangi . Ngoko, konke okanye akukho nto. Mnyama okanye umhlophe. Ilungile okanye imbi. Ithintela abantu ukuba bahlole indawo engwevu kwaye inokukhokelela ekuxhalabeni, ukudakumba kunye nokungazithembi.
Ukuba ufumana konke-okanye-nto yokucinga, awuwedwa. I-Cognitive Behavioral Therapy eLos Angeles ithi yonke into-okanye-into yokucinga ihlelwa njengokugqwetheka kwengqondo, okanye isiphelo esenziwe ngokusekelwe kubungqina obuncinci. Yenye ye eyona nto ixhaphakileyo yokuphazamiseka kwengqondo amava abantu. Mna ngokwam ndiye ndaxelelwa ngabanyangi abahlukeneyo ukuba ndihlala ndibamba ngokugqithisileyo. Ke, ukwinkampani elungileyo.
Kutheni ukucinga konke-okanye akukho nto kuyingozi?
Konke-okanye-akukho nto yokucinga iyasithintela ekukhuleni, ukulungelelanisa kwaye ukonwabela ngokubanzi nantoni na engagqibekanga. Ibenza lula ngakumbi ubomi ngokwahlula yonke into ibe ziindidi ezimbini: elungileyo okanye embi, impumelelo okanye ukusilela, egqibeleleyo okanye embi. Ekubeni ngokoqobo kungekho mntu ufezekileyo, ukucinga konke-okanye akukho nto idla ngokusifaka kwezo ndidi zingalunganga.
Abacingeli be-Absolutist bazijonga njengentsilelo ukuba benza impazamo encinci. Ashley Thorn of 4Points Family Therapy uxelela iPsych Central ukuba oku kususa naliphi na ithuba lokubhiyozela impumelelo encinci okanye ukufunda kwiimpazamo. Xa isiphumo esihle siyinto egqibeleleyo, njengemfezeko, nantoni na engalunganga iyasinyanzela ukuba sihlele wonke umsebenzi njengokusilela. Kungenxa yoko le nto iphethini yokucinga emnyama nemhlophe idityaniswa ngokusondeleyo nokuxhalaba kunye nokudakumba (kwaye ngenxa yoko, ukuzithemba okuphantsi kunye nokungabikho kwenkuthazo).
Umzekelo odla ngokusetyenziswa ukubonisa konke-okanye-nto yonke ukucinga ludliwano-ndlebe lomsebenzi. Umntu ocingayo okanye ocingayo uya kushiya udliwano-ndlebe lomsebenzi egxile kumzuzu omnye abatyhafileyo, bequkumbela ukuba amava onke ayeyi-bust ngenxa yomkhuhlane omnye. Umntu ocinga ngengqondo uya kushiya udliwano-ndlebe lomsebenzi egxile kuwo omabini amaxesha amnandi kunye namabala arhabaxa, eqaphela isiqendu sonke njengamava okufunda. Ngokuqinisekileyo, andizange ndiwuphathe kakuhle umbuzo malunga nobuthathaka, kodwa ngokwenene ndiyibethelele imibuzo malunga namava adlulileyo. Ayilungile okanye imbi, kodwa ilungile kwaye embi.
Iingcamango ezigqithisileyo, ezipheleleyo azithinteli nje ukukhula kwethu; zisiphazamisa ekukwazini kwethu ukubona umgca wesilivere okanye ukubuya umva emva kokukhubeka. Ngaphezulu kwayo yonke into, bayasihlutha iintlobo ezintle, ezingaqhelekanga kunye nezifihlakeleyo zobomi!
Iimpawu ezi-6 zokuchaza konke-okanye-nto yonke yokucinga
Ukuba uqaphela iingcamango zakho zangaphakathi ukwenza nayiphi na kwezi zilandelayo-okanye uqala ukuthetha ngokugqithisileyo-unokuba ngumntu ocinga konke okanye akukho nto.
1. Usebenzisa iimpawu eziphezulu
Amagama anje rhoqo kwaye akaze akhokele ngqo kwizigqibo ezimnyama nezimhlophe. Ndihlala ndiyijija le nto, okanye Akukho mntu uya kuphinda athethe nam, yimizekelo.
2. Unikezela ngokulula
Ukuzibekela iinjongo kuhle! Ukukhupha ibheyile emva kokutyibilika enye akunjalo. Ukuba ubucebe ukwenza uJanuwari owomileyo, kodwa unikezele kwiglasi yeChampagne ukubhiyozela umhlala-phantsi kamama wakho, awuzange uchithe inyanga yonke.
3. Unamava L ow ukuzithemba m
Xa uhlala uzibona njengengcali okanye isidenge, amathuba okuba ukuzithemba kwakho kuya kubetha kakhulu. Asinakukwazi sonke ukuba ziingcali kuyo yonke into.
4. Uba nexhala
Isivumelwano esifanayo apha. Xa i-misstep encinci ithetha ukusilela ngokupheleleyo, ukucwangcisa okanye ukulungiselela nantoni na kwandisa ixhala. Kwaye, emva kwenyani, ixhala liyenyuka ngenxa yokuba sigxile kwizinto ezimbi.
5. Uyalibazisa kunye / okanye uziva ukhuthazwa
Kutheni ude uqalise xa kukho ithuba lokuba kukho into engahambi kakuhle? Bonke okanye akukho nto abacingayo bahlala benqaba ukuqala ngenxa yokuba abaqinisekanga ngepesenti ze-100 ukuba isiphumo siya kuba yi-100 yepesenti epheleleyo.
6 Nina nizityeshela izinto ezilungileyo
Ukungakwazi ukuba nombulelo ngento onayo okanye ukuqonda amaxesha aqaqambileyo phakathi kobumnyama luphawu lokucinga okumnyama nokumhlophe.
Indlela yokwahlukana nomkhwa woko konke okanye akukho nto
Njengawo nawuphi na umkhwa wokuqonda, kunokwenzeka ukuba uzilumle kuyo yonke into-okanye-nto yokucinga. Kuthatha ixesha, kodwa wakuba ugqithile ukubona kumnyama namhlophe, umhlaba uvula yonke inkitha yamathuba anemibala. Isitshixo sihlala sizikhumbuza ukuba kukho iziphumo ezingaphezulu kwezibini malunga nayo nayiphi na imeko.
1. Qaphela
Qaphela ngalo lonke ixesha-okanye-akukho nto yokucinga kuvela. Akukho mfuneko yokuba wenze nantoni na ngoko nangoko. Gqithela nje kuyo kwaye uyibize ngokuba yintoni na.
2. Faka endaweni okanye nge kunye
Amava anokuba mahle kwaye mabi (ubonile Ngaphandle nangaphakathi ?). Kunokuba ubhale amava njengento elungileyo okanye embi, zama ukufumana zombini iimpawu.
3. Chonga iimvakalelo
Emva kwamava, chonga zonke iimvakalelo oye waziva xa ukuyo. Oku kunokunceda ukubonisa ukuhlukahluka kwimizuzu yemihla ngemihla. Kuyenzeka ukuba uzive uchulumancile, usoyika, unethemba kwaye unebhongo ngaxeshanye-nto leyo engqina ukuba ubomi abuyiyonto nje enye okanye enye.
Isine. Bhala phantsi amandla akho kunye nobuthathaka bakho
Kanye njengamava, wena ngokwakho unokuba lilungisa kwezinye izinto kwaye ube mbi kwezinye. Oku akuthethi ukuba uyimpumelelo epheleleyo okanye ukusilela ngokupheleleyo. Unokuba ngumpheki omkhulu, kodwa ungumdlali weScrabble ongemkhulu kangako. Oko akuthethi ukuba zonke izitya oziphekayo ziya kufezeka, kwaye akuthethi ukuba kufuneka uyeke ukudlala iScrabble.
5. Zamkela iimpazamo
Oku kubuqhinga, ngakumbi kuthi thina bantu bathanda ukugqibelela, kodwa hlengahlengisa ingqondo yakho ukuze itolike impazamo njengethuba lokufunda. Kulula ukuthetha kunokukwenza, kodwa ngokwenene indlela eyomeleleyo yokuphucula izakhono kunye nokuba nobubele kuwe.
6. Dwelisa iinyani ngokuchasene nokucingelwayo vs
Bhala phantsi into oyaziyo ngokwenyani. Bhala phantsi into ocinga ukuba uyayazi okanye ocinga ukuba iyinyani. Emva koko, bhala phantsi oko kunokwenzeka ukuba yinyaniso. Yiya endle ngala mathuba.
Xa uthandabuza, yazi ukuba awuwedwa ekucingeni kwakho konke-okanye-kwaye ungakuvumeli ukuba kukubambezele!
