Uthanda iqabane lakho kakhulu, kodwa ngamanye amaxesha mhlawumbi ufuna ukumphosa eweni. Sekunjalo, unomdla wokwazi: Yintoni imfihlelo yempumelelo yexesha elide? Ewe, usathana usezinkcukacha, kunjalo. Ngokutsho kwabaphandi, izibini ezonwabileyo emtshatweni zidla ngokufana nezi mpawu zintlanu.
1. Babeka Isimilo Esilungileyo
Nihlala kunye ixesha elingakanani? Ngokuqinisekileyo kulula ukulibala ukuthi nceda kwaye ubulele xa ucela iqabane lakho ukuba lidlulise ityuwa okanye libambe umnyango. Kodwa izibini ezinobudlelwane obuqinileyo zithi umzamo odibeneyo wokuvakalisa umbulelo rhoqo yinto eyenza yonke into xa ifika kumanyano oluvuyayo (kunye nexesha elide). Enyanisweni, uphando olupapashwe kwiphephancwadi Ubudlelwane Bomntu wafumanisa ukuba ukubonisa uxabiso ngundoqo kumtshato ophilileyo nophumelelayo nokuba isenzo esilula sokuthi enkosi kwiqabane lakho sinokuba namandla ngokwaneleyo okuchasa umonakalo womlo ovuthuzayo. (Ayisiyonto enixambulisana ngayo, kodwa indlela eniphathana ngayo xa niphikisana, ababhali bophononongo bayacacisa.)
2. Ababelani ngokugqithisileyo kwi-intanethi
Sonke sinayo abo abahlobo abaphuma kwi-intanethi malunga nesibini ngasinye esibalulekileyo. Isikhumbuzo sokuqala? Sweet. Isikhumbuzo sokuqala sexesha owawuqala ukwabelana ngeecones ze-ayisikrimu kunye? Hmm, umrhanelwa omncinci. Ngoku ka abaphandi kwiKholeji yaseHaverford , xa umntu eziva engakhuselekanga malunga nobudlelwane babo, kunokwenzeka ukuba bathumele kwimidiya yoluntu malunga nokuqinisekiswa. Ngokwahlukileyo koko, izibini ezonwabileyo zonwaba ngakumbi xa zikhumbula iziganeko ezikhethekileyo ngasese.
3. Bafumana Uchulumanco Ukuzama Izinto Ezintsha
Indawo yokutyela apho wonke umntu azi igama lakho yinxalenye eyamkelekileyo yokuthandana kwenu, kodwa izibini ezihlala zisenza umzamo wokudibanisa izinto zonwabile kubudlelwane, ngokutsho izifundo ezininzi kuquka enye epapashwe yi Rutgers University . Isizathu? Izinto ezintsha ziyasebenza-isenzo sokwenza nje izinto ezintsha kunye njengesibini sinceda ukubuyisela amabhabhathane kwaye sivuse ezo khemikhali kwiziko lokuvuza lengqondo yakho elaliphezulu ngeentsuku zokuqala. Kwakhona, ukugubha izinto akunzima njengoko kuvakala. Akuyomfuneko ukuba ujike kwii-chandeliers. Yiya nje kwindawo entsha yedolophu, thatha uhambo kwilizwe okanye kungcono, ungenzi izicwangciso kwaye ubone okwenzekayo kuwe, uDkt. Helen E. Fisher waseRutgers uxelele INew York Times .
4. Abakhathaleli iPDA encinci
Hayi, asithethi ngesondo rhoqo ebusuku, kodwa izibini ezitshatileyo ezonwabileyo zizona A-OK kunye nezenzo ezincinci zothando lomzimba. Isifundo kwi Ijenali yoBudlelwane boBuqu kunye noLuntu Iingxelo zokuba ukuqalisa ukunxibelelana ngokwasemzimbeni-ukubamba izandla, ukuwola esofeni, ukuwolana-kunokubonisa iqabane lakho ukuba kukho umnqweno wokuba kufutshane.
5. Abazishiyi izitya kwiSinki
Izibini ezininzi zikubeka oku njengenombolo yokuqala yesilwanyana sasekhaya, kodwa izibini ezihlala kunye zidibanisa umsebenzi wokutya kunye, ngokutsho Uphando lwePew . Konke kuhla kumgudu odibeneyo wokuthatha imisebenzi yasekhaya (ekwasebenza njengokuvuma ukuba kunokutya ixesha elingakanani). Ke, eso sitya secereal usishiyile sink-side siyakuthatha imizuzwana emibini ukuvaswa? Vele uyenze. Umtshato owonwabileyo ngumvuzo wakho.
ENXULUMENEYO: Iindlela ezi-5 zokuqhawula umtshato-ubungqina bomtshato wakho, ngokutsho kweNgcali yoBudlelwane uEsther Perel
